that's so stupid; I'd never do that

Things I Said I'd Never do when I was Pregnant (But Now I Do Them All The Time):

1. Touch/rub my belly all the time

I always thought it was so silly to see pregnant women in movies always touching, rubbing, or otherwise bring notice to their very pregnant belly in movies -- Big Fish comes to mind here. Both my sister and I agreed: real pregnant women don't do that. How stupid.

Oh, my God -- I do it all the time! Not even thinking about it, my hands go right to my stomach, rubbing it, massaging it, or just resting on it. I do it because my stomach is usually hurting or I just want to feel Lydia move because it's neat.

Either way, I was wrong, and I shall beg my forgiveness on the internet.

2. Forget things

I have an iron-clad memory for the important stuff. Not necessarily what hotel room number we stayed in at Gulf Shores in the summer of 1991 -- I mean important things like YOU HAVE AN APPOINTMENT AT 2:30 TODAY. I never wrote that stuff down. That wasn't going to go away.

Ha ha ha.

One of the many things I've forgotten is the other stuff I was going to put on this list that I thought of this morning. There was other stuff. I forgot it.

Dammit.

You think I'm trying to be funny but I am so serious. I had this all written out in my head BUT IT IS GONE.

Ooh, I just thought of a new one but now I'm so irritated at myself I'm just not in the mood anymore. Poop.